Mommy's trip to the grocery store goes something like this. Ok what do I need. Crap I forgot the list in the car, but I can't go back. Too much trouble with all these kids. I think I can remember what I needed. Kidsss get over here. In the buggy. Billy leave your sisiter alone now. You are too old to be picking with here. Produce last. Going through the aisles. "STOP TOUCHING STUFF!" These stinking kids. Why couldn't my husband keep them for me to come here alone. At least I would have had a piece of mind. I need this and that. "MOMMY CAN I HAVE THIS PLEASEEEEEE PLEASEEEEE PLEASEEEE" OK OK just be quiet. WOOOOSHHHHH. Oh God what was that. BBBBBIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYY get over here right now. Billy just knocked down the entire display of canned goods. My God I can't pick all of that up. Next aisle condiments, next aisle cereal. Oh myyy little Mike opened the ketchup and is squirting it in Jills hair. Ok I'm fed up its time to go.. forget about these grocheries. I'll come another time by myself. Lets go kids. Then all of a sudden my legs aren't standing anymore. I'm flat on my behind. That lil Mike squited ketchup everywhere and I just slipped in it. OHHHHHHHHH I am about to pull out my hair. But ohh no I'm SUPER MOM I can handle it.Bullcrap!
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PLEASE NOTE THAT ALL OF MY POSTS ARE FOR FUN THEY ARE COMEDIC AND NOT MEANT TO OFFEND ANY PERSON PLEASE EXCUSE LANGUAGE!
Well there is another version of this story that most people probably don't want to know, but it goes:
Now see there is another version of this shopping trip too that lately the public authorities have been soo against because it involves public spanking or ass whoopings (how ever which you like to phrase it). It goes a little like this. Damn, I forgot the list in the car. Ray Ray and Shonte’ wait right here while I go get my list in the car and you better not blink an eye or I’mma whip yo’ ass. How did I ever forget the freaking list. Back in the store... wow they didn’t blink an eye... wait are they ok. *pop each kid in the head* Yeah they alright. Now we are going to get what we need and don’t you ask for a damn thing. I mean DON’T you ask and I’m not playing. Ray Ray no you can’t have captin crunch that mess is too high and I said don’t touch anything. Boy get over here. I’m trying to hurry through these aisles and I here a crash.. I JUST KNOW Ray Ray and SHonte better be behind me. AWWWW Hell no they done knocked over that display. I’m not paying for that shit. Get yall ass over here. *whipping ass* and saying didn’t I tell yall ass not to touch anything. Didn’t I. Ummm excuse me m’aam you should not hit your children like that. B*tch you better get out my face before I dot you right in your eye. That’s why Billy Bob and Suzy Q act like they do hitting you and telling YOU what they gone do. You know what. Forget this I’m outta here. Come on yall I’m going shop somewhere else.
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